Last time I wrote I was sitting next to my 8 day old sweet boy. Today, I'm sitting next to my 7 week old sweet boy. Seriously, someone stop the clock. Remarkably, Dallas is still alive and thriving, it's almost like Brian and I know what we are doing. Well, kind of.
It's been a bit of a learning curve. After all the company left, I found myself home for full days with Dallas and Jake while Brian was back at work. The strangest feeling where the days go by so fast, yet they go by so slow. Where there is so much to do, yet nothing to do. It was as if Dallas was doing his own little triathlon of eat, sleep and poop with some pretty impressive transition times. If the weather was warm enough, we would get out for walks around the neighborhood and if I was real adventurous I would bundle of Dallas, get Jake ready and head out for some errands. The feeling of accomplishment after I made it to the the post office, Walgreens AND the dog park was pretty amazing. Oh, how things have changed!
We have so much love for our sweet Dallas. I can be holding him in the most awkward position with both arms asleep yet I find myself not wanting to move. Instead of getting up and having breakfast, I make sure that he is dressed, fed and happy before I make my way to the kitchen. For those that know me, that is love right there. I find myself awake at the smallest of sounds in the night and just stare at him in amazement of how handsome he is. I look over at Brian, holding Dallas with Jake at his feet and marvel at how those are my boys. I've laughed as Brian takes him and dances around the room, I've cried with Dallas as he cries wishing I could do more to soothe him. I've become that mom that thinks the whole world wants to see every picture of her son and I have to hold back from posting multiple pictures on my social media sites every day. I've witnessed Jake inching closer and closer to him, not quite in love with him yet, but maybe learning to love. Maybe. I've felt my heart fill when he hits the smallest of milestones yet ache knowing that these times are going to go too fast. His half a smile that makes us melt, his wonderment as he sees the world, his cute little whimpers. There is so. much. love.
On Christmas Day I gave myself a present by attempting my first run since July. Like I imagined, it was slow, I was so sore the next day I could barely walk, but I was running! My feet on the pavement, the wind in my face, it was glorious. I promised myself that I wouldn't get discouraged at my slow progress and I have stayed true to that promise. It's been about 3 weeks and I've been back on the bike, back in the pool and on the treadmill. Progress is slow, but progress is progress and little by little, I will get back to where i want to be. I've never been so determined and am motivated more than ever. The dream is Rio in 2016, the Paralympic Games where I can once again represent our country in the sport of Paratriathlon on the worlds biggest athletic stage.
To get there will take a few things. First, I have to get back into shape. Second, I have to compete at a number of races this year which will earn me points and those points add up to an international ranking of all the athletes in my disability class. The higher the ranking, the better the chance. Unfortunately for me, many of these races are out of the country and are not close. For example, in March I will travel to Australia for a race and will try and get there and back as quick as I can. A quick trip to Australia, ha. And to France and Mexico and Canada to name a few. It won't be easy to be away from my family but we knew that this would be the case. And I can only hope that it will be as good for my family as it will be for me. For Dallas to grow knowing that his mom has a dream and is doing what she needs to do to make it come true. I hope that he grows to be a dreamer, watching me and realizing that if he works hard enough, they can really come true. It helps immensely to have Brian on my side and to have his support. He has been amazing and has even agreed to incorporate a race in Japan for part of our honeymoon. So we will spend a few days in Tokyo first, travel to a town close to Tokyo where I will race for points, and Brian can race for fun, and then we'll be off to Hawaii for a few days. Sounds like the perfect honeymoon plan to me!
We have a part time nanny that started last week. 20 hours a week and 20 hours for me to get out, get some errands done, go to the gym, go to meetings, it has been great. The interview process for a nanny was not easy as leaving a stranger at home with your house and your child is a little nerve wracking. Be found this great nanny named Alyssa and she is so great with Dallas that I feel at total ease having her here with him.
Wedding plans are in full swing which is exciting. And scary thinking of all we still need to get done. My speaking will pick up again in Feb and somehow, when we thought things were going to settle down, the weekends are already getting filled. Dallas will be one well traveled young man at the end of this year. And yes, as you can see from the picture, he is already a Spartan fan. Like father, like son.
So there it is. The Road to Rio has begun. This time with a baby, a soon to be husband and a best 4 legged friend by my side. It's going to be a great year.